


Ever A Sweet Victory

by soukokuforlife14



Category: Doctor Strange (2016), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Cloakie and Dum-E friendship is a thing cuz i said so, Howard Stark's A+ Parenting, I honestly can’t believe it’s been so long since I posted something NEW, LOOK AT ME WITH NEW FIC, M/M, Miscarriage, NO THAT ISNT MORGAN I SWEAR, Rhodes is the bestest bestie, Stephen Strange ALSO needs a hug, Steve isn't really in this fic but he's still a dick, The ending is cheesy and self indulgent but I don’t care, The rogue avengers make a breif appearance, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, and Bucky is brought up too, because i could, sexual activities are alluded to, snuck in a line of carolmaria
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-06
Updated: 2021-01-06
Packaged: 2021-03-14 09:28:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,201
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28543332
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/soukokuforlife14/pseuds/soukokuforlife14
Summary: Whoever said victory was sweet lied.It’s not.But then again there really wasn’t a victor in wars anyway. There were just survivors. The Avengers, Tony, survived.Thanos, the mad Titan....didn’t.
Relationships: Pepper Potts/Tony Stark (past), Tony Stark/Stephen Strange
Comments: 19
Kudos: 95





	Ever A Sweet Victory

**Author's Note:**

> .........yo. 
> 
> Idk bout you guys but i felt like it was time for me to get somethin done and posted and im pretty proud to have finally completed this tbh. So I _really_ hope you lovelies enjoy this. QUICK NOTE! The miscarriage is NOT MORGAN! When I started writing this fic mah darling Morgan wasn't a character any of us knew about yet soooooo yeah. Just wanted to clarify that real fast. Anyway, enjoy!

Whoever said victory was sweet lied.

It’s not.

But then again there really wasn’t a victor in wars anyway. There were just survivors. The Avengers, Tony, survived.

Thanos, the mad Titan.... _didn’t._

After four years worth of planning the gauntlet was used to reverse what the snap took away. Carol was a _marvel_ of a woman. She’d been the obvious choice for making the reversal because her powers had been given to her by a stone. But it was one thing to understand that fact, it was another matter entirely to watch her actually do it.

And she did.

She brought back what was lost. Found as many remnants of friends and families as she could and put them back together both literally and figuratively.

However some things remained broken despite the universal fix. Not everyone was snapped away. Some were lost as collateral damage.

Tony and Pepper fell into a rather minor part of the collaterally damaged. Though it had been no easier to deal with.

Pepper left and stayed gone. (She still worked for S.I of course - but what did that matter when their every interaction was loaded with grief over their dead dreams of family and still bleeding relationship?)

Miscarriages tended to create rifts between people. Particularly when it was the stress that initially drove the wedge and ended up stealing away their future as a married couple. Their future with a family.

Even when the snap wasn’t the direct cause, their relationship still splintered and snapped like burning wood.

Because of what happened as a result, the snap was all that mattered to Tony once he’d finally gotten back to earth. An endeavor he nearly thought he wouldn’t complete. Having the likeness of a cockroach when it came to survival capabilities was often a curse and Tony wouldn’t lie to himself by saying he didn’t wish for death during those awful months lost in space. However, the universe moved fast and it was always his job to move even faster. To stay ahead. Because he was a futurist and that’s what he did. 

That’s exactly what he did.

Anyway, the lesson here is that no one tastes sweet victory on their tongue once a battle has ended. Rather it’s a breath of relief which finds its way on your tongue, down your throat, and in your lungs to make them expand wider than you’d previously thought possible. Chest open with the stress now free of its confines in your ribcage. Or at least, that’s what it was always like for Tony Stark.

He thought perhaps the worst part was that, always, without fail, after everything was said and done the relief was short lived. An inhale of breath and exhale of carbon. Upon the next inhale he began struggling anew.

Now that’s because as soon as the latest baddie has been defeated another decides to try the whole “world domination” thing. Or “kill half the universe’s occupants” thing. Or “get revenge” (on _everything_ for their own misfortune) thing. Or, or, or, or....sometimes, Tony really couldn’t see the sense in some of their reasons for doing what they’re doing but regardless it’s a constant worry that some overpowered neanderthal would do something stupid.

Which was why Tony started drinking again. He limited himself to a glass to soothe his nerves if only for a short while. Gave himself a reprieve from the stress of constantly worrying some asshole was going to disrupt the thinly maintained peace they’d acquired since the last asshole.

Six months of quiet meant jack-shit when enemies ranging from the domestic to international to alien to inter-dimensional were always prowling in their respective shadows waiting for an opening to make their entrance.

Limiting himself to a single glass was difficult when he got to thinking about it, and he hasn’t _not_ thought about it for the last four years and six months. Longer. But he likes to look back at these things in increments. Likes to think he thought about it less before Thanos. Even less before Ultron. Even less, less before Loki. (It’s not true, but it makes him feel better and more like his heart isn’t just seconds away from stopping cold in his chest.)

FRIDAY couldn’t always stop him from drinking a second or third either. So as a sort of compromise with his AI, he got himself a drinking buddy. Weirdly enough, his drinking buddy ended up being someone Tony quite disliked at the time. It was the same guy who kinda totally dropped the fate of the universe on his shoulders and somehow expected him not to break under the weight of it (the fact that he _didn’t_ was irrelevant).

No, dislike wasn’t quite the right word.

He didn’t dislike Dr. Stephen Strange.

Tony didn’t like him either. Even now. Well. Maybe he did. Just a little.

He knows for certain he didn’t like Stephen when it -whatever the fuck _it_ even was - started roughly a month after Thanos was defeated.

He’d felt like having a drink but Fri had insisted he call someone to keep him from drinking too much. She understood him too well to think she could manage limiting him herself. Pepper was out of the question, Rhodey had finally worked up the nerve to ask out Carol (and was promptly rejected as apparently, Carol’s a lesbian with a loving wife and daughter), Happy was on vacation, May would absolutely murder Tony if he asked Peter (not that he would’ve anyway), and well...he didn’t have anyone else.

So, he called Stephen.

The guy was surprisingly amenable and opened a portal into Tony’s penthouse before they’d even hung up. Just that alone set him on edge and he nearly regretted inviting the wizard over. He regretted making the guy his drinking buddy less when Stephen later took his discomfort into account and said he’d stop opening portals into his penthouse or the lab.

The little things always stuck out to him. He was a sucker for details and the fact that Stephen would be considerate of that one relatively small thing felt like so much when none of the Avengers ever cared to hear him when he tried to mention something that bothered him.

Tony minded Stephen even less though when another month later, sex got tossed into the messy cocktail that was their companionship. It wasn’t his fault. He was lonely. Drunk because he’d begun drinking before calling Stephen over to get thoroughly and completely shit-faced with him. The Doctor was also hot and that was a fact Tony had never been afraid of admitting. That, mixed with the unfiltered _want_ that permeated the Doc’s gaze when he was a little too drunk to hide it made for interesting results.

That first night was more a dark blur than a coherent series of events but that only left him with a desire to do it again. For...research purposes.

So they did. Then after that it just became a routine of sorts. Every few days meeting up at Tony’s or finding a bar (Wong didn’t let them drink in the Sanctum anymore after the time Tony messed with the wrong artifact). Drinking a single glass before descending into bed to do-the-do and pass out beside each other pretending it didn’t mean anything. 

It worked. Kept him sane, not really because they talked, because they didn’t (not at first anyway). But rather because they didn’t have to. Stephen understood Tony in a way he felt no one else currently living possibly could and Tony offered the same in turn. Maybe that was simply because the guy had sent Tony spiraling into what felt like the worst possible future with no assurances of anything but that _There was no other way…_

Though at the time, between Peter falling to dust as well as nearly everyone else around him and the stone of guilt which sat in his gut over everyone else he had utterly _failed,_ the Doc’s ominous promise served to unnerve him more than anything else. 

It wasn’t until he’d gotten back to Earth that he properly thought through Stephen’s choice of words and decided to motivate himself with them rather than continue to drown in guilt for his inability to die when everyone else around him always seemed to.

Tony’s certain it was because Stephen had personally seen his struggle that he could listen to the billionaire barely articulate just how deeply Thanos’s existence had fucked with him and how it always would, with only understanding in those magical eyes of his.

Stephen was also fucked up in his own ways too. Had issues he hid just as well as Tony himself with a cold expression and sharp focus on the present. He couldn’t ride in cars and the sound of revving engines left him sick to his stomach. He got ridiculously angry at people who sped and held onto said anger for hours after. Then there were the physical souvenirs from his trauma. His hands which had captured a permanent quiver and were in constant pain, discolored with scars lining the backs of his hands and fingers. Marks of his stupidity, his recklessness, his mistake, that part of his body that he hated but served as a reminder to never be that kind of person again. So, the least Tony could do was offer him the same kind of understanding the sorcerer gave him, right?

After a few months that’s just what they became to each other. An abyss they could scream into. An escape they could break away from reality with. A warm pillar of sanity that spoke back without concern lacing their voice but agreement and sometimes even wry amusement. They could discuss morbid topics and not receive criticism for it or the routine “are you sure you’re ok?” - “do you need anything?” - “shouldn’t you be talking to a therapist about this?” - that seemed to find a place in nearly every discussion he had with anyone else. 

Stephen was good at relieving stress in a way that a single glass of booze never could. And based off of the fact that he kept coming back, Tony assumed the wizard felt the same.

However, the arrangement they have would only thrive if they didn’t get too attached. Attachment lead to far too many unknown variables. Created potential for conflict, ruined what they had now and thoroughly busted through the connection they actually did share.

Which was why Tony experienced that cold feeling in the center of his gut, a squeeze in his chest, a type of shortness of breath that never had anything to do with his anxiety issues. A twinge of pain everytime Stephen left, and a rush of affection everytime he laughed. Smiled. Smirked. Got that glint in his eyes almost like he was happy to see Tony. Like Tony mattered. When Stephen touched him and it felt like he cared and wasn’t just there to relieve the pent up emotions he couldn’t put anywhere else.

Tony got himself attached.

He had to wonder why he always felt the need to ruin things up for himself. Why, he always had to go just that inch further, just that tiny bit over the line until he was plunging over the edge, down the rocky cliff side, tumbling till he eventually reached the bottom contemplating why he’d felt the need to peak over the ledge at all.

But, he could deal with it. 

The skeptical eyebrow he was getting though, begged to differ, “Are you sure about this?”

“You can’t ask and then judge me for the answer,” Tony grouched, it was odd to be talking about Stephen with her even if it’s been a year since their permanent break-up. And though they’ve been trying to deal with the ramifications to the friendship they’d had before a kiss blurred all their lines, filling her in about his relationship with Stephen (much like the first time she’d forced information about it from him) felt like he was crossing some boundary neither had named.

He knew it was a somewhat ridiculous sentiment seeing as Pepper was seeing someone too, but she hadn’t told him about the mystery person yet. She’d claimed they were still in the exploratory stage and was annoyingly unwilling to divulge details. 

Pepper’s eyes rolled before flicking up from the paperwork she was sorting through while simultaneously looking over something on the monitor, pausing only momentarily in her work to give Tony a _look_ as she said, “I’m not _judging_ you. I’m asking you an honest question. Are you sure this thing you have with him is...healthy? Last I heard from you about him, you, and I quote, said, _‘He’s kind of an ass with a mean cape and no regard for how much his stupid portal thingies freak me out.’_ Now you’re telling me you routinely have sex with the man, excuse me if I’m confused.”

Tony’s responding sigh was exaggerated, just loud enough to get her to properly look up at him, not just glance disapprovingly, but actually read the lines of his expression before she repeated, “Are you sure about this?”

“It’ll be fine.” 

“That’s not-“ 

“I know.”

Pepper’s lips opened around whatever else she wanted to say. Instead she responded with a quiet, “Ok.” The resignation in that single word weighed heavier than the universe in that moment. Her giving in so quickly felt like another one of those confirmations of the multiple cracks in their relationship. Another confirmation that time was still stitching them back into a place where they could be proper friends again and not awkward exes. Not uncomfortable co-workers. Because in the end, neither knew how to not love the other even if they didn’t love each other like that anymore.

He sometimes wondered when their relationship would shift from civil exes who often told each other too much to friends again.

He wondered if they ever would. 

*

“You’re acting strange,” Stephen commented mildly. A week after Tony’s discussion with Pepper and subsequent agreement to disagree regarding how healthy his relationship with the Sorcerer Supreme was.

“Why, my good wizard, isn’t that your name?”

Stephen cocked his eyebrow a touch, raising his glass to his lips before responding, “Did something happen?”

Tony turned his back to the man to put the expensive alcohol away, attempting to formulate a good response. His typical bullshit turnaround responses didn’t just fly right by Stephen anymore. Not when he was truly invested and judging by his tone if Tony said the wrong thing Stephen would work to get the truth out of him all night if he felt it was necessary.

_Annoying._

“Not really.” Tony said, which was true. His day had been mostly stress free with no SI meetings and zero encounters with the Rogue Avengers. The only person he interacted with who could’ve really ruined his near record breaking number of eighteen days without some kind of panic attack was one James Barnes who he spoke to earlier that morning.

It was about his B.A.R.F treatment and the new arm Tony was assisting with. Communicating through a screen made interactions easier but Tony still wasn't one-hundred percent over what happened in Siberia. However, James was _trying,_ and had been since the moment he got down on his hands and knees and apologized. No excuses, no addition of _“Hydra made me do it,”_ just a simple, short, and dangerously genuine _“I’m so sorry”_. Forgiveness wasn’t easy and he knew it wouldn't ever be; but after that it became a real possibility.

There were also the bonus coins in his pity jar since the poor bastard was one of the dusted. Recognizing that fact and just how much one James Barnes had been put through, it seemed unfair to continue holding a grudge against him for any of it. Which then made Tony decide to try talking to him as someone other than just a victim of the Winter Soldier’s crimes.

James Buchanan Barnes turned out to be a pretty decent person too. A much better person than a certain Captain Asshole.

He wasn’t quite a friend but he wasn’t an enemy either. Tony was resigned to their sort-of relationship staying that way.

Stephen’s eyebrow miraculously raised further, “Then what’s wrong?”

“Nothing really, uh, yeah. Everything’s totally peachy. Sometimes my brain gets talkative but hey, that’s the point of these little meetings of ours. Right?” Tony said with a wink, picking up his own glass to take a long swig from his glass and swallowed audibly as he went to continue, “just to get our minds off all the shit we don’t feel like dealing with?”

Stephen’s eyes narrowed slightly, “I suppose...what are you over-thinking?”

Tony lips quirked wryly, “The usual. I just skirted the black hole today,” he answered, a half truth. However the black hole which he was referring to didn’t lead him back to old trauma, rather he was taken to a much better place - though it was just as problematic. Stephen didn’t need to know that though.

Finally, Stephen nodded, seemingly satisfied with Tony’s response. For now, which he thought was a win no matter how temporary.

The cloak, which had been utterly stagnant for the last few minutes, even perked up at the change of mood. Allowing that conversation to end lightened the air and enabled them both to relax properly. The cloak apparently took that as a signal to slip from Stephen’s shoulders so it could go play with DUM-E. Cloakie was quite fond of him and while Tony didn’t understand how the two communicated, they enjoyed each other which was all that mattered.

After the cloak had disappeared the night carried on as it always did.

They talked.

Tony mocked the Rogue Avengers who he’d had the displeasure of dealing with earlier that week when one of them had yet another complaint about the team that handled their gear. How their items weren’t nearly as durable, powerful, and just in general not as _cool_ as Stark tech and therefore wasn’t worth using.

His role as mediator between the Accords Council and the Rogues was incredibly taxing. Their re-use of arguments which had already been beaten to death at this point made for interactions that felt tedious and _oh so boring._ The fact that they could spend hours spitting acid didn’t help either with how often discussions devolved into full blown hissy fits.

Honestly, how could Rogers be so damn surprised the council no longer took any one of them seriously?

Stephen seemed to enjoy the two minute long rant about how stupid Steve’s expression was, which had been an annoying merge of kicked puppy and confusion. Like he didn’t understand why things weren’t working out according to what he desired. Tony always walked away from those meetings full of irritation like a balloon with too much air blown into it.

Once it was Stephen’s turn though, the man had quite a few hilarious tales about the students at Kamar-Taj, something about a magical chicken here, another about a woman gone nuts having decided she’d turn all the assholes in her life to toads only she didn’t do it right and they had massive amphibians running rampant through the courtyard…turned out she’d been more powerful than anyone, including Stephen himself, gave her credit for. Power she didn’t have a handle on in the slightest.

It was the sort of outlandish that Tony had grown used to hearing about. And was glad to _only_ hear about it rather than personally deal with it. The fact that Stephen found it just as amusing made him feel less guilty about how openly he laughed at the man’s struggles.

Even Wong, apparently, had cracked a smile when Stephen got himself swallowed by one of them. Stephen was less amused as he explained _that_ part.

The night carried on as smoothly as it always did.

They talked. They laughed. They got drunk. They had glorious sex.

Just like they always did.

Tony refused to feel hurt when Stephen eventually left.

Just like he always did.

*

Pepper, it turned out, was not the only one who thought Tony’s relationship with the supreme master of wizards was unhealthy.

Rhodey was far less courteous about it, “That relationship dynamic makes zero sense Tones, you can tell him your innermost thoughts but can’t muster the will to just tell him you love him?”

Tony waved a nonchalant hand, “We just don’t have that kind of relationship. He doesn’t feel that way. Besides, he’s like an anti-depressant and I just got a little more dependant than I meant to.”

Rhodey raised an entirely unimpressed eyebrow, “Yeah, ok, that sounds healthy,” he said in a judgemental drawl.

Tony didn’t really have anything to say to that either. So he didn’t say anything at all. Just left Rhodey to stew in his judgement. It wasn’t like it mattered, Tony knew he wouldn’t be breaking off this _thing_ he had with Stephen. Regardless of how anyone else felt about it. 

Pepper, Rhodey, Happy. They all knew it too. Which was why none of them pressed the issue. Even though sometimes, Tony wanted them to. 

*

Victories were never sweet. They were just reliefs. Brief moments in which he could breathe out his anxieties before sucking them back in.

The odd battle with an even odder baddie was no different. They beat the ever-living-shit out of the idiot who was purple now when his initial complexion had been green. His plot to destroy the Avengers bested and his magical capabilities stripped of him by none other than the supreme sorcerer himself. 

However, even though victory didn’t taste sweet to _Tony,_ his “teammates” often begged to differ. So Stephen’s nagging — that he’d followed Tony all the way back to his lab to do — and even Steve’s previous words of reprimand were just really starting to piss him off. 

“I got a head injury. I’m not dying. FRIDAY literally scanned my entire body and determined I’m absolutely _fine_.” Tony snapped, interrupting the man before he could continue his rant about Tony’s lack of self preservation skills. 

Stephen sighed. Even the cape seemed frustrated with him, fluttering in time with Stephen’s words as he said, “You took an unnecessary hit for nothing. What if worse had happened? What if that shot of magic had done more damage than just throwing you into the concrete?”

“Doesn’t really matter though does it? Nothing more than that actually happened. I hit my head. I have a _raging_ headache and you are seriously irritating me which isn’t helping,” Tony responded. 

The sorcerer glared at him, eyes ablaze with what felt like too much anger for the situation and something else Tony wasn’t quite sure about. “I don’t care if I’m irritating you! What I care about is your safety! Something _you_ seem to not care about at all!” He said, the cape flapping vigorously behind him. 

“Did I die and I missed it? Did I almost die? Because I’m pretty sure neither happened! Yeah, I got banged up, I certainly wasn’t the only one,” Tony said pointedly, hand waving up and down in gesture to the obvious cuts and scrapes adorning Stephen’s face. 

“My injuries are entirely superficial and could heal in a matter of days. Concussions can kill you within hours after the fact.” Stephen responded, the cloak once more reacting to his tone of voice, straightening out like Stephen’s point ended the conversation there.

Tony shrugged, “Well let’s hope I don’t die later then.”

Cloakie reacted first, doing a motion which looked like some kind of indignant huff before backing itself off of Stephen’s shoulders and floating itself out of their little argument entirely.

“Tony,” Stephen sighed in exasperation, ignoring the cloak’s dramatic exit. He raised a shaky hand to settle on his forehead like he had a headache, “That isn’t funny.” 

“I’m not trying to be funny.” Tony said, arms crossing over his chest as he raised both eyebrows, “Do I _look_ that funny to you? Because I’m pretty sure I don’t _sound_ like I’m joking.” 

Stephen ignored him and asked, “Why are you always nearly killing yourself?” His hand, shaking with a harsher tremor than usual dropped from his face to hang in a fist at his side.

Tony snorted, “If I was trying I would’ve succeeded. Clearly,” he paused with an exaggerated hand gesture over himself, “I’m not trying.” 

“That isn’t the point and you know it.” Stephen said, anger bubbling in his voice again.

“Am I supposed to apologize now?” Tony scoffed with a sneer pulling at his lips.

“I don’t want an apology, I just want you to fucking care about yourself!” Stephen shouted, the sound of it jarring, full of more emotion than Tony could ever draw out of the man when he wasn’t drunk.

The shout startled them both into taking a step back. Tony’s prior irritation left him as confusion took its place, settled a frown on his lips as he looked the sorcerer up and down. Searching for anything in Stephen’s expression to indicate exactly what he was trying to say as a single question floated like driftwood to the forefront of his mind. _Why?_

Was it just a concern about losing his fuck-buddy and occasional conversation partner or something else? Was it too hopeful to believe it could be anything else?

The man didn’t wait for Tony to say anything, simply continued to speak, voice quieter, “Why don’t you? Don’t you care at all about the people you’d leave behind?”

Tony responded but his voice came out more vulnerable than he meant, “What, are you one of those people I should be concerned about, Doc?”

“Is it so wrong to have thought I was?” Stephen asked in response, voice strained like a rubber band stretched too far. An emotion Tony struggled to decipher swirled deeply in those eyes of his which refused to meet Tony’s.

He didn’t understand. Stephen couldn’t mean that. Right? What they had was meant for de-stressing and talking about things they couldn’t with anyone else. But...there wasn’t love between them. Just a one-sided affection quietly beating within Tony’s ribcage. Not Stephen’s.

Right?

Unsure of what to say and feeling uncomfortable with the heavy weight of how serious Stephen was, Tony just snorted, “That afraid of losing my ass huh? That’s fair, I guess, it’s a pretty good ass.” 

At that, Stephen paused, stunned like he’d expected Tony to say something else. Maybe just acknowledge the seriousness of what he said. Acknowledge the feelings he was attempting to convey. Then he deflated. All the anger, the fight, fled away to leave nothing but resignation behind it, “Sure, Tony.”

He refused to allow the shift to bother him, at least, not outwardly. Tony didn’t know if there was anything else to be said at that point and he didn’t appreciate the way his lungs seemed incapable of taking in more air.

Finally, Stephen looked him but it was with so much hurt and exhaustion caught in the creases of his face that Tony wished he’d look away again. It was familiar, that look. The kind Tony had seen on Pepper’s face more times than he cared to remember, always following a bad fight. 

Stephen had never looked at him that way before. 

That expression didn’t change and the natural nuance of colors in Stephen’s eyes had been lost behind a grey sheen which lay a shadow over the rest of his features, “I...I think I should—,” he started, hand raising like he was going to reach out but stopped halfway through the motion.

“Gotta go?” Tony questioned, wishing the man would fully reach out and explain the pain in his gaze or the reason he’d been so angry to begin with. Spell it out. Whatever _it_ was. Because that was what Tony needed and the sorcerer had always been good at figuring out what he needed. But Stephen did none of that. Instead he nodded and opened a portal. No further words for the mechanic who couldn’t understand anything that wasn’t some kind of machinery.

When Stephen stepped through it his back stiffened, like he was physically straining not to turn around. He didn’t, even as the cloak came floating over to him, landed squarely on his shoulders with a flourish, the collar curling in to brush over Stephen’s cheek. Then the portal closed swiftly behind him and Tony had to fight himself not to feel like he’d been abandoned.

He’d pushed Stephen away, not the other way around.

*

“I’m inclined to agree with him Tones, I may not like the look of the guy but he’s got a point about you being too reckless with yourself.” Rhodey said as he stepped into Tony’s lab, patting DUM-E’s claw on his way like the good godfather he was. (Rhodey thought it odd to call himself such but, by Tony and DUM-E’s own insistence, he took on the title of “godfather” to Tony’s robo-children with pride.)

Tony groaned loudly, drawing out the sound for a maximum effect, “I didn’t call you over here to tell me he was right! I called you over here to be angry at him with me!”

Rhodey just laughed as he stopped next to Tony who was looking over plans for safety modifications to Peter’s iron-spider suit. It was his go-to when he needed to do something with his hands and something else with his head than think about all the hard stuff. “Uh-huh. The point still stands though. It really isn’t necessary to be so reckless with yourself.”

Tony harrumphed, “That still wasn’t the important point! Besides, what do you even mean you don’t like the look of him?”

Rhodey raised an eyebrow, arms crossing over his chest as he said, “Literally? He dresses funny and his cape is alive. It’s freaky and weird. Not so literally? You’ve spent the last three hours feeling abandoned because you two had a fight, and have spent the last year pining after him when he really only seems interested in using you. I think those are pretty damn good reasons to not like what I see.”

Which, most of that was true, however he hadn’t spent the _full_ three hours since Stephen left feeling abandoned per-se. Though he did spiral into self deprecating part of his brain at some point, he eventually decided to put that hate on Stephen for a while. And since he knew his MIT pal didn’t like Stephen solely for how much he had unintentionally created emotional turmoil in Tony’s life, he was obviously the best person to hate Stephen with him. The problem was, Tony may not have been so good at hating the sorcerer himself, “Ok first, he wears the robes because they are what very professional wizards wear. Second, the cape is a sweetie who loves DUM-E. Third, he’s absolutely not _using_ me. If anything, I’ve been using him.” 

Rhodey snorted and the sound earned a scowl from Tony, “Yeah ok, I don’t think being an emotional abyss he can dump all his problems into counts as using him, Tony.”

With a wave of his hand Tony tossed the plans aside to give their conversation his full attention as he retorted, “It’s mutual!”

“Hasn’t seemed like that to me,” Rhodey said, an air of finality to the way his eyebrows drew together and his lips fell into a flat line.

Tony threw his hands up, “You haven’t even properly met him.”

Rhodey cocked a skeptical eyebrow, "I think I know enough."

Tony huffed, frustrated more with himself and his own decisions than Rhodey and replied, “You don’t.”

Of course Rhodey didn’t know Stephen beyond whatever courteous conversations they’d had on the battlefield or what Tony’s told him. He didn’t know Stephen the way Tony did, didn’t know the depth of his irises or the mirrored depth of his soul. Didn’t know the cape, didn’t know Wong. He didn’t know what made the man tick, what could break him and what kept him together.

Tony did. Tony knew all of those things about Stephen. Hoarded those truths about the man like a dragon hoards treasures. 

That’s why even upset, and hurt, and feeling so beyond stupid, he couldn’t genuinely hate the man. Especially not when their last interaction ended the way it did because he had pushed the man away when confronted with the potential of his love not being unrequited.

That had been a truly terrifying thought and too much to deal with when Tony was raised with a fist and vitriolic rants about how useless he was. His mother always told him that was his dad’s way of expressing love. Not in warmth, or affectionate embrace, but in cold fury when Tony screwed up. Because he _cared_ about Tony’s future and had to teach him how to not ruin it. Tony had always known that was bullshit, that his father yelled at him because he could. Because he couldn’t yell at the people truly at the source of his ire which Tony had always managed to set off. There was no love and if there was he’d never felt it.

Reconciling a near love confession following Stephen’s lecture felt odd because for the first time Tony actually felt like the shouting was done out of genuine concern and not just an excuse to take out pent up rage on him. Even Rhodey, he doubted sometimes. His best friend knew it too. Had learned how to best deal with him when he made a mistake. To never shout. To remain calm. To not move too much. To keep his hands seen and relaxed. But Tony hadn’t told Stephen about any of that yet. For every truth he’s given Stephen he’s held onto ten more.

Rhodey’s expression shifted entirely at those two words in a matter of seconds. Lips quirked in a triumphant little smirk like that was exactly what he knew Tony would say, “For a genius you’re a real idiot, you know that?”

The tension in Tony’s body instantly fled from his muscles. Of course his honey bear just wanted him to admit he wasn’t half as angry at the sorcerer as he wanted to be. Tony pouted, “Why Platypus, that’s rude.”

“And also very accurate.”

The mechanic rolled his eyes with another huff, though it was more for show than anything else. Rhodey was right, he usually was. “FRIDAY, can you believe him?”

_“He’s right, boss, you’ve been making poor decisions regarding mister Strange since you realized your more than platonic feelings for him. I saw no reason to rebut any of his statements. Especially after what happened earlier.”_

“My decisions haven’t been _that_ bad.”

Rhodey gave him a funny look as FRIDAY responded with — _“I will make no further comment.”_

Tony’s eyes widened to a comical size as he said, “Baby girl I think your silence is worse.”

_“I do not believe so, boss.”_

Tony guffawed as Rhodey cackled from beside him, “Ok now you two are just being mean, tag-teaming me like this!”

Rhodey’s laughter eventually tapered into short breathy giggles, “I’m pretty sure that man confessed his undying love for you earlier and you sent him away but _I’m_ the mean one?”

“I didn’t send him away, he took himself through that portal,” Tony pouted, fully aware that he had, indeed, sent the man away. Instead of just talking to him like any sane, normal person would when they were told how much the guy they’d been pining after for the better part of a year cared —a lot— about them and their safety.

“Besides he hadn’t actually said he loved me...” Tony added weakly.

Rhodey scoffed, “FRIDAY told me what happened, verbatim. I could read between the lines man, and you were the one doing all the pushing away.”

“I—fine, yeah ok. Maybe I did,” Tony said.

Rhodey’s amusement morphed into something softer as he placed a steady hand on Tony’s shoulder, “What are you waiting for?”

The million dollar question made Tony snort as he turned away from Rhodey. The answer was one he’d hardly admitted to himself and he wasn’t sure how to properly explain it to Rhodey. Though his best friend clearly wasn’t letting him get out of this. With an exaggerated sigh he answered, “I don’t know. A clearer sign I guess, that I can try this again and it won’t all crash and burn and I won’t walk away feeling more broken than before and _wow_ , ok, saying that out loud really makes me feel like a coward.” Tony ended his ramble there by shutting his mouth with an audible click as shame trickled through him.

Rhodey hummed softly next to him. The sound forced Tony to look at him fully, expecting to see disappointment but instead Rhodey wore a small sympathetic smile which seemed to exude a soft honey glow—and yet he still wondered why Tony called him his honey bear—as he responded, fingers tightening briefly over his shoulder, “You’re not a coward, I’m over here still bruised by Carol’s rejection. Can’t imagine how you felt after everything was almost perfect with Pepper. But, at the same time there’s always a limit to how long you can wallow in that hurt and fear. At some point, you have to let it go, otherwise it’ll consume you. You know that, because you’ve lived it before.”

The _“you don’t have to live that way again,”_ wasn’t said but was still heard loud and clear.

Tony scrunched his nose, “I hate when you’re right.”

The man flashed a smirk, “Then you must hate me a lot seeing as I’m _always_ right.”

Tony gasped, “Are not.” 

“Are too.”

“Are not!”

“Are too and you know it.”

Tony grinned. He knew it, always did. Always would.

“Are not.”

*

As it turned out, getting into contact with a magical wizard who evidently _didn’t_ want to be found, was in fact far more difficult than he’d thought it would be.

It took over a month for Tony to see Stephen again and it’s in less than ideal circumstances. Their meeting came abruptly though not quite unexpectedly. Tony knew there were always assholes waiting in their respective shadows for their chance to have a _moment_. 

And god, are their moments dramatic.

But because of said new asshole the world was falling apart around them again in such an odd parallel of how they’d met. Amidst the chaos they fell in together again and worked alongside each other seamlessly like the fight hadn’t ever happened. The only indicator that it was even something Stephen still thought about it was the dull shade of his eyes as they followed Tony through the battlefield.

Even wounded emotionally as he was, the man still found it within himself to worry for Tony’s well-being.

It was a sobering thought. If Stephen could wear his feelings so clearly — and how he missed those that whole time was a mystery — then Tony certainly could too.

Once the fight was won and Tony could simply _breathe_ he immediately stepped out of the suit and turned to find Stephen. What he didn’t expect was for Stephen to come to him. What he expected even less was to be _shouted_ at. Of all ways to open a conversation between them he didn’t think it’d be with the same topic they’d left each other on. But that’s exactly what happened. Tony couldn’t even be mad about it either because that finally gave him a chance to make things right and he refused to waste it.

First, he waited for Stephen to shout out everything he needed to, then without any thought at all blurted “You are one of those people I don’t want to leave behind.”

Stephen paused with a frown, eyes flicking over Tony’s features likely in search of clarity to what he meant by that. When Stephen found nothing he responded with a deeply confused, “What?”

“You asked, I’m answering.” 

“I don’t understand—,” 

“I—uh… well, kinda fell in love with you. So I definitely don’t plan to die on you if I can help it.” Tony said in a flood of syllables and emotions. Looking up into Stephen’s eyes, he watched as slowly but steadily understanding spread over those sharp features.

The pause between what Tony said and when Stephen seemed to actually get it was long. A little too long. As Tony stood there waiting for a response he began to wonder if he’d made a colossal, heart rending mistake, if Rhodey had made a colossal, heart rending mistake, and they’d all had some horrible misunderstanding. “So are you going to say it back or—,” 

“If you think I haven’t been in love with you this whole time Tony Stark, then you’re not nearly as smart as I thought you were,” Stephen said in an amused huff of breath, head shaking as the smallest smile pulled at the his mouth.

It took Tony longer than he cared to admit for what Stephen said to sink through his skin and sear the truth of it into the beating thing in his chest. “Oh, that’s good, your answer took a minute and I was about to feel really embarrassed. Ok we’re on the same page then. I’m glad, I’m never on the same page with people. Most people are like way far behind.” 

Stephen grinned at him like nothing made him happier than listening to Tony ramble about people and pages and _wow_ he hadn’t ever looked at Tony like that before. No one ever really looked at Tony that way. With such open, unadulterated, pure, fondness. And yeah, love. There really was no reason for him to have not seen it sooner.

 _Stephen loved him._ Rhodey really was always right. He’d need to tell his bestie as much later. For now though— “Are we gonna kiss now or what? Cause I think we deserve a kiss.”

“I don’t know, are you done talking,” Stephen responded with laughter in between his words.

“Oh and you’re playing the gentleman by waiting for me to finish?”

The sorcerer smirked and said in the most Wong-like deadpan, “No, you’re just making it harder to want to.” Tony gasped in mock indignance, “Excuse me sir, I’ve been told many-a-time that my voice is _extremely_ sexy—,”

“Shut up, Tony,” Stephen said before descending upon him, shaking hands rising to cup Tony’s face in the gentlest hold. Tony immediately fell into the embrace, his own hand coming up to lightly grip Stephen’s robes, right over his heart, sighing softly at the contact.

Getting to kiss the man sober for the first time was educational in that Tony learned just how much he’d been missing.  
The kiss itself was slow. A greeting of sorts. Felt like a beginning as opposed to every other time they’d kissed, a sense of desperation and urgency behind every touch that made it feel like that embrace would be their last. This kiss wasn’t like any of those kisses.

It was wonderful.

And for a victory following such a difficult fight with himself, this _was_ pretty sweet.

**Author's Note:**

> If you read this whole damn thing, thank you! Comments and Kudos are love so leave some if you enjoyed this! 
> 
> Aaah peace out sweeties, I hope to deliver more fic soon!


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